The most scathing restaurant review of all time?

[rooman]

The most scathing restaurant review of all time. As insults go, these surpass any I could think up.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyl ... jay-rayner

[phillisc]

The Weekend Australian's food critic John L's review of Hill of Grace last year was classic...Mucoid gloop IIRC was a wonderful descriptor.
Interestingly though (you would be vehemently told otherwise by the boffins at Adelaide Oval), the restaurant is never close to full and at 8 PM last week when I walked past, just two tables of diners.

Cheers
Craig

[Sigmamupi]

Jay Rayner must have some interesting dining companions. This one claims to know what "eating a condom that’s been left lying about in a dusty greengrocer’s" tastes like. More seriously, his photos compared to the photos used by the venue are illustrative.

[michel]

Genius review
I prefer smart friendly modern bistros for the lunch special for under 40 euros
And get a decent wine for a decent price

[rooman]

Jay Rayner must have some interesting dining companions. This one claims to know what "eating a condom that’s been left lying about in a dusty greengrocer’s" tastes like. More seriously, his photos compared to the photos used by the venue are illustrative.

Yep that was the comment that got me. that and the skin from a burn victim on the dessert.

mark

[Polymer]

A bit too try hard IMO...some of it was funny but really, I wonder if this author eats out much...

The clincher for me was the Pigeon comment...it was just incredibly ignorant...You've asked your pigeon to be cooked medium? And then comment on how it was raw when it probably came out close to Medium Rare? Already it sounds like they overcooked it...

Then his photos...seriously? So those are apparently the photos he normally takes when doing a review? Get F*cked...They were out of focus and the composition was terrible...I'm actually hoping PURPOSELY so because otherwise that is even sadder...Thousands of blogs out there right now have better photos..these were a joke...

I'm not even saying he was wrong about the restaurant...but it comes across better when it actually looks like you have experience...and this guy didn't...

[rooman]

Kev

I'm not sure you read it carefully enough. Apparently he's been reviewing restaurants for 18 years. Seems long enough to form the odd view or two.

As for the photos, he explained he had to take them on his iPhone as the restaurant wouldn't allow him to use his camera which was his standard MO.

At the end of the day however it was just an amazing review, not one to be taken too seriously.

[Bobthebuilder]

Photos on the sly with an iPhone are difficult at the best of times, let alone in moody lighting

[Mike Hawkins]

We used to take clients there.... and it is definitely stuffy and very 'French'! But the food is normally excellent....

[mjs]

Saw this a week or so ago, it was on the Project I think as well as fb. What got me were the photos. If he used the shots supplied and "authorised" by the restaurant, then if the food really looked like his sly iPhone pics, then there was a fair bit of significant mis-representation in the official pics!!

[TiggerK]

Well it certainly got a lot of publicity..... What Me Cynical?

[Ian S]

That's Jay Rayner - such reviews dropped in from time to time, do I'm sure help drive readers to the newspaper / column

[Ian S]

p.s. he covers the photo bit later in the review - the restaurant don't allow photos of the food (and for that I applaud them - this modern trend is an ugly one IMO), so he had to sneakily use his phone to take a few snaps to show the difference between stock photos and what was served.

[sjw_11]

I read Jay Rayner regularly and he is a good reviewer. His tastes skew close to mine - preferring unfussy bistro food and bold flavours to places with a lot of gimmickry or based solely on "technique".

His review this week of Bibbendum shows he is not averse to still giving a good rating to a pouncey arguably over-priced establishment if he thinks the food is up to scratch.

However, it is worth bearing in mind he writes for the champagne socialists of the Grauniad. There is a mandated requirement to criticise the elite and to pretend to hipster values and gender neutrality, etc. As such the occasional tearing down of a very expensive monument to haute cuisine is clearly good for business...

[Bobthebuilder]

I must say by the sounds of it
That pigeon was cooked to perfection
And would of been one of the rare occasions I didn't find the meat overcooked

[michel]

I must say by the sounds of it
That pigeon was cooked to perfection
And would of been one of the rare occasions I didn't find the meat overcooked

I concur

[Polymer]

Kev

I'm not sure you read it carefully enough. Apparently he's been reviewing restaurants for 18 years. Seems long enough to form the odd view or two.

As for the photos, he explained he had to take them on his iPhone as the restaurant wouldn't allow him to use his camera which was his standard MO.

At the end of the day however it was just an amazing review, not one to be taken too seriously.

I know he took them with his iPhone but that isn't an excuse. Have you seen iPhone photos on blogs? They're quite good...in fact, I know quite a few professionals that have stopped carrying around a camera for casual photos because they can get great ones from their iPhone..So someone that takes photos and does reviews for a living can't take a decent iPhone photo? I dunno..it doesn't fit...

Anyone that orders their pigeon medium..then refers to it as raw when it is closer to medium rare..how can I take I take their opinion about food with any level of confidence? Again, I'm not saying he's wrong about this restaurant...but it is hard to take his opinion about a high end restaurant seriously...

It is like a person going to a high end establishment and complaining that the meat was done wrong because it wasn't well done...and then making fun of it for being close to alive, etc, etc...Would you take that person's opinion about the place seriously?

That's why the rest of the article just comes off as really try hard...you take those things away and the article is probably quite enjoyable to read...but the pigeon thing plus poor iphone photo just makes it all comes off as inexperienced...

[Ian S]

Hi Kev
Sorry to labour the point, but he said he had to sneakily take the photos, as the restaurant didn't allow photos to be taken. If there is one thing that a good maitre d' has in French restaurants, it's a very perceptive beady eye!
regards
Ian